Here I sit all in wonder, the past few weeks I've been waaaay down under.
Feeling better now not totally sure, what brought the change, to my door.
I received a message from a dear sweet friend, telling me to get it together I can't pretend,
That I've not been myself to do and create, but Someone else who had taken a stake
And drove it deep within, my very being, causing such a stir I was not singing
Nor feeling very jolly, but stiff as a board to be used as a dolly,
To move objects, from here to there; now that the cloud is gone and in the air,
Is the feeing of hope, and as I tried to cope,
I did my daily prayer, and wondered then, what I thought was unfair.
Why do these things happen to me? I give of myself totally free,
Of seeking in return a favor or two. That's just me, and how I am through
And through, but still I wonder at times, and know to be true,
That coming from this I will be stronger and wiser. I will take this experience to use as a visor,
Because when the sun is bright I want to see, and use the visor---God's gift to me.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
I'm not totally sure what is going on inside my head, but I do have some ideas. It's like all I'm doing is going through the motions, even though I am generally in good spirits. But, every time I sit to write a post, my desire vanishes....almost immediately. I don't want to just throw anything together just for the sake of posting. If I don't feel it, it's not real for me....therefore, not real to you. When I write, it is important to me that what is written is from my heart as well as my mind. I'm hoping that expressing myself in this way will help to bring me out of this slump. I'm really disappointed that I haven't posted anything on the birth of my grandson.....this really bothers me.
I haven't tweeted or been to my Facebook page on a regular. I thought I might be falling into a depressed state but I think I can rule that out. I still laugh and talk; when I work, I feel like my normal self.
My mind is still full of new ideas, my creative side is alive and well. I know we go through things that affect us in life, and I have had many moments in the past that have been similar to this, but this one is hanging on as if never to let go. I will bounce from this and hopefully very soon. I'm sure there are others out there who understand what I'm going through. I've been praying and would appreciate any help in that area.