Thursday, February 10, 2011

On The Bright Side

Positive thinking is a good thing to do. It has many benefits that outweigh the feeling of failure should things go south against what you would expect...or at least hoped for. 


It gives the mind something extra to work on that promotes a focus on not being despondent, or fall into a depressed state, anxiety, remorse, let's not forget anger....and the list goes on...get my point? 


A bit of a kick is exactly what is needed for me to keep from becoming a basket case in my own mind. Sure, I'm dealing with a lot right now, but I'm aware that I will have my moments as time continues, and I also know that I need to be me for me. 


I have to fight for me, I am in a battle I can't afford to lose. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I want to run from the emotional feeling that comes with the loss of a loved one. I am fully aware and willing to let these emotions surface in order for me to deal with my brother's absence...that's part of life, as painful as it is. 


I do feel overwhelmed right now. I feel as if I'm being pulled in directions that are waiting to be found. There are other issues that I am currently facing on top of what I already have going on. All the more reason to fight the fight. 


I will mourn and I will heal. I will fight because I am worth fighting for. This is about me...it's about my journey. I have goals to reach, I have goals I won't reach but I will have at least made an attempt. I have ideas waiting to be dreamed up and ideas waiting to become reality. 


There will be things, events, people and whatever else may come my way to help or hinder this process. It will be up to me to decipher these and to utilize or throw out what is useful or that which is trash.


It really sounds easy doesn't it?...except for one thing. I truly and honestly believe that in my mind, this can be done easily if it wasn't for the emotional factor. Bring emotions into the picture and it get's ugly at times. I'm ready for that too.... 


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