What In The World?

In my post yesterday, I wrote how I was having pc problems. Now I'm having a blog problem? Well not really a blog problem, but I did lose my signature. 

For those of you who have been reading my posts, I'm sure you remember seeing my blue signature at the end of each one. Notice something missing?

I think some unseen force is trying to bring me down! 

It's not gonna work! I will not let these past couple of days get the best of me. I will however conquer whatever it is that is hanging over me right now. 

It is somewhat discouraging but not the end of the world.

Ladies don't take offense to what I'm about to suggest. Maybe if I let my feminine side out and boo hoo and just get downright hysterical, I'll be left alone. Naaaaa. That won't work. 

The only thing I can say right now is...what in the world?

Reggie (It's just not the same)

I Don't Need This

No...it isn't people, it's things. It started last night before bed. My pc is not recognizing my DVD burner. I have a spare DVD drive and tried to attach that but it didn't work either. I know the drives are good so it is my motherboard or power supply. I'm leaning toward the board.


It also affected some, not all files on my hard drive...how?...ugh!!


I don't need this right now, but I have to figure this out. 

My Feminine Side

I know I am a man. And I also realize that I have a feminine side. I don't have a problem with this. 

I know that it is ok for me to cry. 

Yes I get teary eyed watching some scenes in TV shows or movies. I mean I don't flood the gates, but yeah...and I'm ok with that.

I'm ok with knowing who I am. Not pretending that I care. When I express myself in anyway, I want the recipient of my actions to know I am truly sincere. 

I don't want to go through life just getting by; that includes my emotions. 

One day I had pulled up my T-shirt designs to see where I was. As I scrolled through, I began to notice something. Most of the designs are leaning more toward the feminine market.

I sat back and looked at the screen for awhile. Then I thought, you know what?...I'm ok with this.

It's ok for me to be in touch with with my feminine side. Instead of resisting, I have chosen to incorporate this side into my life. After all, it belongs to me. It has not given me a desire to seek out the male sex on a personal level. What is has done is to allow me to be me in every way that I can.

Men and tears is not a bad thing. I make fun of it at times, but it is actually a cleansing. Being able to release those emotions, setting myself free.

Yeah, I have a feminine side...and I'm ok with that.

It's Nice To Go Back

I really enjoyed the two days I had off. It was relaxing, fun, and productive. The productive side of it was relaxing and having fun, enjoying family. 


I am absolutely loving this weather...yes, even in the 50's; the sun could not hide today, not a cloud in the sky. The blue sky was bright and making it's presence known.


I've been home for a few hours and haven't really done anything. I talked with Darcel for a bit. The girls were busy doing what they do and Samuel was asleep in his wrap. 


I made it up to my room and I folded a load of laundry I had in the dryer from yesterday. Do I have to tell you about the other personal stuff I did?....no?...cool. 


Let's see...have I learned anything lately that I could share with you? I'm sure I did but I don't remember.


Darcel just stopped in for a bit to set recordings and came across The Wizard Of Oz. We both talked about how we used to watch it every year.  

I remember watching when I was a kid. Watching it now in HD is like watching it fresh. The colors are vivid and bright. Nakiah and Ava are gonna love this. It does bring back memories. 

The Day After

I woke up this morning fairly early, around 7 o'clock.  I lay there for as long as I can stand it. Right now I have instant coffee so I have to go down to make a cup. I will be getting my ground coffee so I can set the timer...I've missed that.


After having my one daily cup, I had to make my next move. I wasn't sure what that was going to be. When we got home last night, I moved the couch out of my room in exchange for a mattress. I wanted the couch because it served a duel purpose due to my limited space. But I was getting tired of sleeping on the couch.

So now that the mattress is in the room, I had to make some other adjustments.  

This is my blanket

I have this stand that I made for my keyboard and mouse. I also use it for my remotes.







It used to be taller than it is now. I had to remove the lower portion because I could not see over the top of it. I pieced this together out of different materials I had in my room because I gave my desk to Charles and Darcel. They had a desk but couldn't turn down the offer. That happened in Minnesota. Anyway, after taking it apart and then putting it back together, the stand is now perfect again.


Now what am I going to do with the lower half?

I'm sure I'll come up with something. I also had to lower The TV because it would be to high if it was left on top of the woofer. 

After

Before

I was catching up on NCIS while I was doing this. This was my second time through this episode. 


I like the change.

Time to Reflect

Today is Thanksgiving Day and many will visit or be visited by friends and family. It is a day that will be filled with laughter, catching up, and possibly some tears along the way.


Tables will be covered with food and drink. The aroma that is filling the air even now will fill the nostrils and tingle the senses of all. 


Many will be giving thanks for countless reasons that they feel are meaningful to them. Times of reflection will engulf the minds of those who are remembering where they were at a given point in time that brings them to this moment of giving thanks.


I know I had mentioned how much of a hard time I was having at work, but it is important that I stress the point that I am truly thankful that I have a job. I mean this wholeheartedly. A time when so many people are struggling this time of year to put a meal on the table. 


 I know what it's like to be out of work and wondering where the next meal is coming from. After reading the beginning of a most recent post,  I wanted to change it because even I didn't like what read.


This is my moment to reflect and to be thankful for what I have because I remember looking for work and not finding any.


Happy Thanksgiving To All. 

I Made It

My first day back to work since I started my blog challenge was yesterday and it was interesting. I'm not gonna talk about it. I have come to the understanding ....again....that the best way for me to deal with work is to be quiet. 


I have been so frustrated lately and the more I complained, the more I became, so you will really get the picture, enraged. So in order for me to keep my sanity, I must be quiet.

It was a warm November day yesterday in the 70's, but today will be about 15 degrees cooler. I'm gonna miss yesterday. It could be worse, I could be in Minnesota :-) I do miss Minnessota. The area we were in was about 30 miles south of Minneapolis-St Paul. Burnsville. mmmmm. 


One thing that fascinated me about that area was the bicycles. Everybody had one and I mean everyone. Not only that, but they ride them all year long....at least some of them do. I'm talking freezing cold, snow, ice, it didn't matter. I couldn't believe what I was seeing but day after day, as I drove to work I would see the same people bundled up real good and peddling their bikes.


Some were college students on their way to class, some were just going to work, and maybe some were taking a winter joy ride....brrrrr. I guess if you live in that environment for a period of time, you can get used to that.


Oh yeah, some of you may be wondering if I was in a good mood all day. Let's just say that I was able to accomplish what I wanted and that was to get through the day. After all, it was the first day. I remember how I felt as I was driving home; allowing the work day to ease it's way out of my mind and body. I began to relax and started thinking about what I would do when I got home. I had about a twenty minute ride home and it was later than usual so traffic wasn't bad at all. It was thick in spots, but moving...key word. 


When I got home, I said hello to Ava. She was on the floor playing and then I noticed Samuel getting excited sitting on Darcel's lap, but before getting Samuel, I turned to say hi to Nakiah who was on the couch watching TV. I don't think she looked up. I like how Samuel gets excited to see me when I get home. Of course it's not the same as when he spots Mommy or Daddy, but I'll take what he's giving me.


It'll be nice when I get my own place, no doubt I will surely miss these moments.

In The Midst Of A Storm

I'm into my fifth day of consecutive posting and I have to admit that it has done a lot for me so far. My stress level has gone down a great deal, but I have been away from work and this will be my first day back since starting my 30 day challenge, beginning on the 19th. 


So we'll find out if I'm able to keep this good mood going. I'm realizing that a lot of my frustration is stemming from the fact that I'm not used to struggling through being in good moods. I do have my moments when I want to be alone and not be bothered, but who doesn't.  I think I might be out of sync...or should I say I am out of sync. I may as well; it would help to admit it out loud.


OK, that's done. 

Challenges of life can taxing to say the least. I know I have hoped and prayed for awhile now that my situation would change. In some ways it has. In a lot of ways it has not. I have not really questioned God as to why, but have wondered in my head and out loud as to why; and I believe I am asking myself when the questions arise.






















Imagine a ship at sea in the midst of a storm without navigation, looking for the light from a lighthouse to help guide them. If the light is not shining, does that mean the lighthouse is not there?














So what about my hopes and prayers? Does that mean God is not there if nothing has changed? 


I know He is still there and always will be. So what does that mean? For me it means that there are things that I should, can, will, and must do in oder to achieve that which I seek to accomplish.


I don't think the occupants of that ship will give up just because they are unable to see the light that might guide them to safety. I believe they will do whatever they can to accomplish their goal...to survive the storm.

I Love A Challenge

I wasn't going to say anything, but I'm in the beginning of a 30 day blog challenge. It began on the 19th. I have to say that so far I am really enjoying this...but's it's early. Not that I don't enjoy writing, I'm afraid of the block. It's not here yet so I really shouldn't even be thinking about it...besides, that's not like me.

I'm really good with communicating with people. I make friends easily, but for some reason, I have trouble opening up on my blog. Thus the challenge.


This will be good for me in a lot of ways and we will all find out together.


The picture?....I just like it. It was a random pick. It has nothing to do with the post title, I had actually forgotten to title this post. I had finished the post with I just like it. ....I love coincidences too. 

Some Time Out

I have been blessed with another day to fulfill and I am thankful for that. What will I do with this day? I haven't made any special plans to do anything. Some Sunday's are a laundry day for me if I don't get it done on Saturday. This weekend I was able to get one load done late yesterday. I'll get the other load today.


It is a bright sunny day and I just opened the blinds to allow the vitamin D to shine on in. It will no doubt warm up a tad in here but not much because it is not a hot sun this time of year....at least not here in Virginia Beach. I like being in an area that I can go about without heavy gear on in November.


I went to the Zoo with Darcel and the grandkids yesterday. I don't get out much and she invited me along...mostly because she knew I needed it. I had been venting some frustration to Darcel lately and I'm sure she figured I needed a change of some sort...even if only for a couple of hours. It did help and I enjoyed the time with them. It wasn't crowded and I think that made it more enjoyable. 
Darcel took pictures and I keep forgetting I have a camera on my phone, so by the time I remember, we had passed all the large animals, but I did get a shot or two before leaving....how they got out of their environment remains to be told.

They weren't wild so I guess it was ok.

Feelings

I try to go about life treating people with respect. It really bothers me to hurt someone's feeling, sometimes even when they deserved it. 


I'm sensitive enough to believe that change can happen, but smart enough to realize that if I can't change the world, I can change what I can.


I get irritated when things stay the same for a long time without a hint of change or improvement.


I love being with my grandchildren, holding them, talking to them, playing with them and remembering what it was like when I was doing the same with mine. 

                                             Darcel and Reg

Bits and Pieces

Some people have said that I am cocky. I like to think that I am being confident in who I am. Consciously, I do not give off an aura of cockiness; I do believe that it stems from having conversations with me. What do you mean I talk like I know everything?


Actually, I consider myself to be on the geek side of manhood with a little smooth around the edges. 


I remember being shy throughout my life, although many would say otherwise. I am quiet under certain situations until warming up, especially when in a group of unknowns.


When I was younger I was really good at remembering numbers. Tell me a phone number one time and I had it. I loved Math in school up until Trigonometry. When they introduced that to me I lost it, but I survived it. Speaking of school, that was my most shy times when it came to girls; oh I dated, but there were certain girls that I had trouble with. In other words, I stumbled a lot...they had no trouble being themselves around me, I was just a goof at times. Maybe I just put them a tad high on the pedestal...ya think? Some things never change.


Moving on...my school days was a mix of good and bad. I was too afraid to do wrong for fear of what mom and pop would do to me. I was pretty good at most subjects during those times, but as I came into Junior High I realized that I didn't enjoy learning anymore. All I wanted to do was get through Junior and High school and be done with it. Looking back, the way I was being taught in school had a big affect on why I did not choose college. In some ways I miss not going to college, but even if I did attend I knew I would have trouble. I love learning, Love it. I think learning through a book is too slow for me. Don't get me wrong, I know it is absolutely necessary to study and hit the books...for certain things. I see why parents choose unschooling or homeschooling, it's more natural...that would have been good for me; I see that now. 


Hey, get this... I like to read. I used to read mystery, drama, and yes I even dabbled in some romance. My most recent reads have been computer magazines. It's been awhile since I've even read one of those.
Most of you who have been reading my blog know where a lot of my time has been spent. Reading, as much as I love it has been limited to my monitor; I know I know... shameful. I've been telling myself I should get back into reading.


I'm missing something....oh yeah, my tools. *sigh*   

Who I Am

Who I am remains to be told
And as time goes, all will unfold
For all to see what I am about
I'm lean for my age, and pretty stout


I believe in God, as my creator
And thank Him often I'll tell you later
For now I will say it's because of Him
My current situation, does stem

I am the creator of The Bottomless Heart
I love so much the designs that are a part
Of my life today, to bring joy and smiles
To the lives of loved ones for miles and miles


I am a grandfather of three, 2 girls and a boy
They fill My Heart with so much joy
To hear them laugh and play
This age I wish they could stay


But time will not allow this to be
For they will grow older along with me
As their grandfather straight off the cuff
The Bottomless Heart and other stuff


Will be a foundation for them to build
And to add as they please within the field 
Of family friendly products for all to enjoy
And the many people they will employ


I could go on but here I'll stop
But I will continue, with clip and crop
As designs and words from here to there
Will come to fruition, I'll be sure to share 

Behind The Scene

Sometimes you really put a lot of time into doing something.


Then there are times when it seems that nothing is getting done no matter what you do. You find yourself staring into space.

Has everything come to a stop?; or is it a period when writers block has settled in. What about all of the previous efforts that have been put in; the countless hours? 

                  
I believe that all of that hard work is still being implemented. All of those long hours and hard work is still doing it's job, Behind The Scene.  


So yes, it is ok to have a blank time; maybe that is a time for refreshing. 


But then when it is time to get back to work, you may find yourself in front of what some may think is fuzzy and cluttered.

But for me, it's a place where countless hours of mistakes, setbacks, perseverance and accomplishments take place. It is my workstation. 


Why do I spend all of those hours shaping and sizing, trying to see what looks better, what colors to use,which fonts goes where and I'm really picky when it comes to stuff like that. Is it for me? The Now is for me, such as the learning, the ideas, the drive; the long term effects are tiny and growing.

   

I'll be spending a lot more hours and making more mistakes; stubbornness and achievements along with those three up there will be what keeps me going. When I'm sitting at my workstation and I hear the giggles and the cries, the "words" from the youngest as best as he can speak them, being spoken at the top of his lungs, joining in the fun. The sounds of running and uncontrolled laughter. 


These are the sounds that I hear at times, and they are also going on, Behind the Scene. 


Sometimes I'll get the occasional visit when I have something on the screen that I'm Workin On and Nakiah will ask "what's that you're doing? Hey Ava, come see what PeePaw is doing on his computer." Next thing you know I have a zillion questions and all I can do at times is smile. I let them help a couple times, they got a kick out of that. 


I like what I do...but I Love the reasons why.

Samuel and PeePaw

When you are holding Samuel, he has a way of letting you know if he wants something by leaning in that direction, and I do mean leaning. He shifts his whole upper body in that direction to get his point across.

Darcel got the camera and Samuel spotted it. He either wanted the camera or his picture taken because he loves that, or he wanted both. He had to settle for the picture...ain't he cute?

The Winner Is....

Yes, we have a winner for my giveaway.

The winner is Theresia Reistad and her entry came from my Facebook Fan Page. 


As I had posted on my Fan Page a week ago, I had drawn a name who was a follower from Twitter, but the winner failed to contact me to claim the prize.


Congratulations to Theresia. I'm sure she will enjoy the cards as well as the loved ones and friends who will receive them as a gift from her. 

It's Monday Night!

Yes, it's Monday Night and yes I am watching football. I'm hoping for a good game. It's just about to start. Both teams, The Bengals and The Steelers are in the same division as my team, The Browns. This is a tough who to root for. On one had, a Bengals loss would help The Browns and a Steelers loss would help also. A Bengals win, would tie up the bottom in the division. 


OK...the Bengals fumble the opening kickoff and the Steelers recover. It didn't take long for them to score...TD.


Now for the Weather....just kidding. 


I miss having my tools...I think I just realized that. I miss that part of my life; working with wood. I've said before that I am not an expert at woodwork, but I really enjoyed the smell, measuring, drilling. I have a table router I haven't used yet. When that time comes, it will be that much more enjoyable; for now I have enough going on. 


Preparing myself mentally for the winter. I'm liking winter less and less these days, but I at least have the pleasure of being in an area with milder winters. Look at that...I got the Weather in anyway...hmph.


I guess I've been doing some reflecting lately; looking at where I've been and where I am now. Physically I feel fit, some aches; mentally I know I'm doing better these days; financially?...workin on that.


Well, I gotta go...I have some work to do...by the way, it's halftime...yeah, I know.